trip to the toilet. After yesterday’s feast, the apartment had not yet been tidied up, half-asleep, stepping over dishes, bags and chests, he grabbed the handle of the restroom, and at that time his feet slapped down into some kind of liquid. As usual, he began to grumble at his wife, believing that she accidentally spilled water on the floor. However, his nose caught a suspicious smell, and he, realizing that this was no ordinary water at all, froze in place. Since he was distracted by the liquid surrounding his legs – he pulled the toilet handle towards himself without much thought, and due to the inertia, as they say, what next happened, happened. The slurry that had accumulated in the toilet rushed over him like a shaft. He jumped back into the corridor. Temirbek’s family woke up from their sleep and immediately found themselves in the noise of this bedlam. Inside the toilet, sewage was pouring out of a thick black pipe with loose fittings, and this eruption had no end. It can be assumed that the inhabitants of the upper apartments indulged in the pleasure of using communal amenities. Temirbek instantly flew up the flight of stairs. And as if reporting an enemy invasion, he pounded his Tatar neighbour’s door with his fist. The door was opened by a thin, yellow-faced old woman with glasses. “Ni kirak sizge*?” She asked. “Oh god! Lady, Do not touch your toilet. God has cursed us!” He pushed the old woman aside, bursting into the apartment, shouting: “Who’s in the toilet?” “Oh, God save our souls, what is this about?” “I won’t ask again, who is in the toilet?” “Ibatullah is in there.” “Everything has gone to hell, Ibatulla!” Temirbek pulled on the handle of the toilet door: “Ibatulla, come out of here!” He demanded. “Quick!” Ibatullah’s strained voice was heard: “Give me a moment.” “Forget ‘a moment’, come out now! My apartment is being carried away by a flood. Don’t sit on that toilet. Whether or not you finished the duty or not – get out soon!” Ibatullah came out, very embarrassed, his face was covered in red spots. “God, these Kozakhlars* won’t even let you sit on the toilet normally,” he tried to joke. “Well, what do you need?” Temirbek quickly explained to him the essence of the matter. Then
*Ni kirak sizge – ‘what do you need?’ in Tatar